I was helping some people move a while back. And, besides the fact that I am vastly out of shape, and, my frame appears much stronger than I am, I was deeply hurting beyond a physical pain that day. I don’t lift much weight very often, so my muscles tore ever so slightly that day, because they wanted to increase, but, the true pain came across an 8 year old boy.
This kind, loving, little boy, saw that we were helping this elderly man move, and, him being a kind, loving boy, helped us out by opening doors and carrying little boxes. After about 15 minutes of moving, he pulled me into the elevator alone, and, started crying. I asked him what was wrong and he looked at me with his soft, broken eyes and said” Do you know what’s wrong with me? My daddy left me when I was three.” He later told me, every time he sees someone move, this question consumes him.
Every day, I look at my food, and, this surge of guilt consumes me. I am reminded of all the people who told me growing up, that I wasn’t enough, that I had failed them. I am like this little boy in so many ways, because, I ask myself this question too. Do you know what’s wrong with me?
There is this passage in the first book of Corinthians that says “The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law.” Its like the author Paul is saying, by saying don’t do something (the law), we are directly tempted into doing it. Growing up, people used to guilt me for eating, and, tried to show me how bad it was, low and behold, I fell for it harder than anyone I have ever met.
I have an amazing friend named Jory. Jory and I were hanging out a few weeks back and he had told me that if he would have met me back in my addiction, he would have liked me the same. He told me that if I ever relapsed back into my addiction, he would love me the same. I have come to Jory several times, talking about how I felt like I was relapsing and how I felt guilty for eating, and, he helped me accept my situation, and, show me how I am fine the way I am, eating addiction, or, not.
This little boy I met, I hope, I pray, I wonder, if I was able to be for him, what Jory is for me. I hope for this little instance, that I could come by him and tell him that he is fine the way he is. I hope to help him realize that he is fine the way he is, father or not.
I think sometimes in life, we need someone to step into our situations and help us abolish the laws that we have created in our lives. For me, this law is food. Low and behold, when Jory tells me these things, the desire to overeat, the guilt of overeating, slowly fade. Jory, was Jesus for me in this situation because not only did he help me abolish this law, but, he was also helping me fullfill it too.