I don’t like to do many things, when I do, it consumes me fully. Communication has become this way for me. I want to be able to communicate on any level to the highest level I can.
A form, this form of communication, writing that is, is one that I am particularly fond of these days because the opportunity to communicate to people during the day are rare for me, and, communication begins with conversations at night. Stephen Pressfield, in his wonderful book The War of Art talks beautifully about overcoming resistance. Pressfield explains how things like Sex, laziness, food and any obstacle that our lives create are forms of resistance. This being said, I want to overcome resistance and possibly become a better writer by doing just that….writing. I am going to try and write some words every day on here. If anyone has the patience to read this and would critique any part of this, I would become extremely gracious. Also, I believe in doing this, it will serve not only as a therapy to me, but, a gateway for you to learn more about me.
Today, I would like to write about the catalyst to my weight loss.
I was 21, lonely, broken and 485lbs. Struggling with addiction and no sense of self worth, I walked the aisles of Walmart with my then girlfriend, and, we were picking out food because she always wanted me to lose weight (anytime you manipulate someone into something, especially, when its your attempt to change them, the recipient, is vastly damaged because you’ve treated them like an object), and, I separated from her because I felt she was being impatient and inconsiderate because I felt she wasn’t being flexible (we sound like a married couple don’t we?). I get to the liquids aisle, and, I was looking for two forms of God’s nectar, Powerade Zero and Crystal Light. With Powerade Zero in my hands, (Mixed Berry, because, I know you’re concerned with what flavor I like to drink) when I arrive to the Crystal Light (once again, I drink Pink Lemonde), and, I bend over to pick up the Crystal Light, and, shortly after looking up to find a little kid, no more than three or four years old, pointing at me from his moms cart, and laughing at me. He looked at his mom and said “How do people get that big?”. I walked away from the aisle, ashamed, broken and in search for something more.
Soon after, by a miracle of God the cancerous environment that I was in with my then girlfriend ended. This began the search for something more meaningful. In my search for something more meaningful, I not only found God, I also found myself.
There are several people in my life who inspire me to overcome resistance:
My friend Corey Magstadt has done a remarkable job being a stay at home Mom (Lucky Bastard), but, he also has created Launch Ministries (http://www.launchministry.org/)
And, my friend Dusty Rolli: who continues his pursuit of being a Heavy Music Superstar:
I hope everyone has a great day, drive safely!